I've always had colleagues from other sbps or day schools ask me how my school could maintain its academic performance by constantly placing 1st among all sbps in malaysia. it seemed weird to them that my colleagues and i are at school well after the formal school hours are over. most of the time, we stay in school until well over 5.00 p.m. (well, not all of us, anyhow, but suffice it is to say that many of us do stay back until around 5.00), especially if there are programs scheduled for that particular week. i guess the concept isn't alien to me since i've been here the past seven years, so i guess it just grows on me.

i suppose it's true what people say, that sustaining the momentum is much more difficult than working hard towards success. which explains why our school calendar is practically full of activities every saturday..so much so that sometimes i find it difficult to cope, that i just wish i could get some breathing space, just so i could cope with the frenetic pace that has been so synonymous with my life for the past seven years. don't get me wrong, i do love my job, i love working...but i guess there are times when i just wish that i could step on the brakes, stop by the roadside, and smell the flowers... sometimes i just feel so bad i couldn't make it to catch up with old friends, because of my hectic schedule (which is so atypical of a teacher's)... and to find out that my cat was dying, through my sister's blog was just , i dunno... so not right. so yes, i am guilty as charged, of being busy...sometimes too busy to even have time for myself.. i think i can count the days this week when i was able to stay awake past 9 p.m. (cos i'd mostly be dead to the world by 9.30 most days this week).. so yes, i guess the strain of work for the past month (we've been working six consecutive saturdays this month) is starting to get to me..since i'm practically conked out by the time my head hits the pillow (and i'll only automatically wake up at 5.30 the next morning!)

there are times, i admit, that i feel like i'm being a bad daughter/sister/friend for not being able to be wherever i'm needed, mostly because of work commitments. cos in most instances, my work always comes first. but on the other hand, i always try not to have anything to do with work-related stuff come school holidays..cos those are the times when i can chill, spend time with family and friends, and to just be.

it's a tough life, working in a stressful environment where my colleagues and i have to constantly ensure that the kids perform according to the targets we'd drawn up. but then again, i wouldn't have it any other way. as hectic and crazy as it can sometimes get, it's my life.